Marital Aids Advice Site

Fun with Produce - the Homemade Cucumber Dildo

I remember a fuss on the news back in the early 90s because a sex education course was teaching innocent young high school girls to masturbate with cucumbers. I'm sure lots of girls (and grown women) thought "wow, what a great idea!"

Buying a dildo or vibrator in a sex shop was probably quite a nerve wracking experience back then, before you could buy sex toys online. The appeal of using a cucumber as a sex toy, like with all homemade sex toys, is that it's cheap, and nobody knows what you are buying it for. They just assume the cucumber is for a salad, or sandwiches and tea :-)

Another nice thing about using a cucumber as a sex toy is that you have access to a variety of lengths and thick nesses to choose from, just like real sex toys. You can choose a thick dildo if you so desire, or a smaller cucumber to use as a homemade anal sex toy.

A cucumber can be enjoyed peeled or with it's skin on, but peeled is usually better. Peeling the cucumber reveals a clean surface, with a PH level that's safe for the vagina. This also removes the little bumps on the skin of the cucumber that may cause some irritation.

A cucumber, whether peeled or not, can be made even more hygienic by covering it with a condom. Using a condom covered cucumber can also reduce friction.

Use: Simply take the cucumber and insert in to a well lubricated vagina. Natural lubrication is best, so you may want to stimulate the clitoris until the vagina is moist. Of course you can also use a commercial personal lubricant for this, or even saliva.

Slip the cucumber in and out of the vagina while stimulating the clitoris for best effect.

Get creative with the peeled cucumber. Using a sharp knife and some care, you can carve a penis head into the end of your homemade dildo. You can also peel the cucumber so that it has straight sided facets that feel good when the cucumber is twisted.

You can also use your cucumber as an anal dildo, in this case lubrication is a must.

Afterwards, you can simply dispose of your cucumber in the garbage, or compost it.

Dildo Guide:

Start Learning

Dildo SectionDildos

Vibrator CategoryVibrators

Anal Sex ToysAnal Toys

Men's ToysMen's Sex Toys

GuidesAdvice & Tips

Sex Aids

humor & satire | site map


© 2007 - - Celebrating 10 years, since 1997! - about us / contact